Sara's First Christmas

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A Charlie Brown Christmas didn't do it.

It's A Wonderful Life didn't do it.

Reading about it, watching others celebrate and occasionally celebrating with them didn't do it, either.

What did it?

Well, this morning around 5am I crawled into bed next to my sleeping sweety, snuggled up REEEAAALL close, and waited. The intention was to fall asleep for a couple hours then wake with Lora and Ashley to open presents. Those damn presents have been sitting in my living roomm under a tree for a week now (Something unheard of before this year, especially the crazy ideal of having a tree in my living room.)
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Sleep didn't come.

By 6am I was going iNsAnEE!Image hosted by Photobucket.com So I woke Lora, woke Ashley, then headed down to the tree and...waited. Neither Lora nor Ashley got up! I couldn't believe this crap! What the heck was wrong with them!!! So I went back upstairs and both wanted "one more hour" (Sara says in a whinie crybaby ass voice!Image hosted by Photobucket.com )

So over the next hour I ate some cheese and crackers, watched part of a cartoon about Jesus, and basically sat staring at the presents. 7am the alarms went off. Because I set Lora's and Ashley's alarm clocks, put them on the far side of the bedrooms and cranked up the volume!Image hosted by Photobucket.com

I darted upstairs and waited for the sleepy heads to get up and turn them off. Ashley was first up so I grabbed her by her hand and drug her downstairs to the couch. I then went after Lora(Who was lying there letting the alarm ring.) and made her get up, too.

Over the next few minutes I finally found the meaning of Christmas and IT WAS THE OPENING OF PRESENTS THAT DID IT!!!
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See, now I understand what you Santa worshipers are all about. You're taught from an early age that on CHRISTMAS you get PRESENTS and it makes it the most exciting day of the year. Moreso than birthdays because on Christmas you get to open your presents as soon as you wake up!
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The drawback is, from what I've observed, that you eventually grow out of it. The older you get, the less important it is.


What I got...

A portable dvd player. (It looks like a laptop and that's what I thought it was at first.)

A collectors set of books about Buffy the Vampire Slayer along with a few other Buffy things from Spencers at the Mall.
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A hardback edition of Kingdom Come by Alex Ross and Mark Waid. (It has extra pages that wasn't in the four issue series.)
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The Mammoth Book of Unsolved Crimes. (YAY!!!)
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A 10x13 framed pic of my daughter (sleepy head) Ashley. (YAY! YAY!)

Two CDs. (Christopher Beck and Robert Duncan. Both instrumental composers from Buffy.)

An outfit that Ashley picked out for me because she wanted me to look more "mom like" when I went to her school. (When I saw it I thought, "frumpy pink is NOT for me.")

Two pair of strappy sandles.

And, the bestest, most wonderful present anyone could evereverEVER get!!! NEW SOCKS!!!


Ashley of course made out like a little bandit. Because it's her first year hear and everyone likes the helpful little runt so much, she got Christmas presents from people who had never bought one before in their lives!

Even Elder Malcom came over this afternoon with a gift. (Funny thing; He came into the living room, looked at the tree, and said, "Well, isn't that...(pause)...pretty." with a confused look on his face like he'd never seen one before.)

I cooked Cornish Game Hen, sweet potatos, stuffing and corn for dinner and invited my neighbor Annalara to eat with us. I also invited the rest of the family but they all poopooed the ideal with a "We ain't celebratin' no stinkin' Jesus" attitude.
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At least Lora's mom, Ruthanne, showed up and celebrated with us. (Plus my bff Katie is home from college and she hung out with us this evening along with a couple girls from Lora's lesbo brigade.)
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So, that was Sara's first Christmas. Hope you guys had as much fun this year as I did. I still prefer our Yule celebration (We use a log instead of a tree.) but Christmas (PRESENTS) ain't so bad!

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Lesbian Nun With A Big Gun said...

Nice gun, girl. Marry me in the convent in a secret ceremony , and we'll cheat on Jesus together! He'll never suspect a thing!

Sara's Stuff! said...

A lesbian nun with a big gun wants to secretely marry me in the back of a convent, spiting the big J, yet leaves me no way to tell who she is. :(

Bummer. :\


DungeonMasterJim said...

"The drawback is, from what I've observed, that you eventually grow out of it. The older you get, the less important it is."

You have SO much to learn about Christmas. You NEVER grow out of receiving presents! (At least, not my family!)

roger said...