Can't think straight tonight

It's hot and humid and there are insects outside my window screaming in the darkness. Lora is away and that makes it far too quiet.

Deadgrandma is sitting on the floor at my feet and she keeps touching me with her long dead fingernails. She keeps trying to lay her rotting head in my lap, repeating over and over, "Grandma just wants you to rub her hair," but there's maggots tangled in it and even when I just reach down to push her away they fall out and land on my leg, squirming frantically trying to find more dead flesh to eat.

The wallgnomes, whom I haven't seen since they upped my meds in January, have come out and are dancing and singing on my desk. I yell at them and they run away to hide behind my computer screen but are very shortly back dancing on my desk again.

I wouldn't mind them so much but they must have killed a field rat today because there's blood all over them and they're leaving little bloody footprints all over the place. (I have to remember to clean them up before Lora gets home cause last time she pretended she couldn't see them and it kinda freaked me out.)

Now one of them is sitting right on the edge of my desk, dangling his feet over the side and talking to me like we're old friends or something. I do NOT speak wallgnome and it's little voice is SO irritating and almost violent sounding.

Every once inna while a HUGE drip of snot will start to leak out of it's nose but as soon as it reaches it's upper lip the wallgnome sucks it back up then licks the leftovers off. Afterward it looks at me and smiles, like it's funny.

The little yellow one doesn't come around anymore since I caught it masterbating in my panty hamper. I think the insects are getting louder.

Another odd thing that's been happening; I've noticed that the smileys at the Bendis Board are acting strange. They keep switching places and even expressions. One minute a smiley is smirking, the next it's got a angry face. And I swear, I thought I saw one of them whispering to another while looking at me out the corner of it's eye. They think I don't notice these things but I do!

Lora will be home around midnight. She went with the Lesbo Brigade to see Ammityville Horror. I would have went with them but I've been unwell lately and the last thing I need to do is see THAT movie. Not too sure what state of mind it would put me in. I couldn't explain this to Lora so I just told her I wanted to stay home and watch Monday Night RAW!

Monster head started calling for me from the spare bedroom. Dead grandma got up off the floor,(FINALLY!) went to my bedroom door, and yelled at him to shut up. Now she's walking down the hallway to where he's at to argue with him. I'm glad. It takes her mind off tormenting me. Now if my cat would come upstairs and chase these damn annoying wallgnomes away things would be good again.

I'm going to get offline for awhile. I have an hour to try to pick the lock on the knife drawer in the kitchen. I've been unsuccessful so far but in time I'll figure out how to do it. They can't keep me away from them. I use to go next door to my step-dad's house but he started locking his knives up long ago.

Annalara lives close but she watches me whenever I come over. Once I was sitting at her kitchen table talking to her whilst she peeled potatos, she got up to rince the peeled potatos off taking her knife with her and leaving it in the sink. She turned around and started talking to me then stopped, and I'm guessing early senility set in cause she forgot she lay the knife in the sink and said, "Sara, what did you do with that knife," like I was going to take it or something.

I just thought that was SO very, very wrong.